OT outrageous wedding requests?

I understand tacky, but it sure would make a lot more sense to give them
something they need/want than another fondue pot. Or my favorite, a silver
celery server.

joan
joan o'reilly
http://members.aol.com/Joan8904/index.html

And you know, thats the one thing I wanted and didnt get! ;-)
Diana, sans silver celery server

--
Queen of FAQs
Royal Peace Maker
http://photos.yahoo.com/lunamom44

"Joan8904" wrote in message
...
I understand tacky, but it sure would make a lot more sense to give them
something they need/want than another fondue pot. Or my favorite, a
silver
celery server.

joan
joan o'reilly
http://members.aol.com/Joan8904/index.html

Taria wrote:

You guys are experts on just about everything. Help me out
here. I just got a shower invitation and at the bottom
was the places the couple are registered. One was this one:

http://www.thehoneymoon.com/
They actually have a registry so people can pay for their
honeymoon! I thought I had seen just about everything.
I guess not yet. Is this OK? I know there is a lot about
this notion of weddings getting more out of hand but I
think this is over the edge. What do you guys think?
Thanks, Taria

How tacky! Actually, I'm old fashioned enough to think sending gift
lists in with the invitations (unless previously asked for) is tacky.
When I got married (OK, 22 years ago, but have manners changed so
much?), my mum kept the list and if people wanted it, she'd give them
two or three suggestions from the list, carefully fitted within their
probable price range (sets of expensive sausepans were suggested to
aunts and uncles with high earning power, toasters and the like to
student friends). Some of our more far flung relatives sent money
(easier than organizing a gift from the other side of the planet in
those days!), and we got a lot of the stuff with that. When I wrote and
thanked them, I told each person what I'd bought or put the money
towards. I still use the towels bought with the £10 my granny's next
door neighbour sent.

Friends who got married a couple of years ago popped their list in with
our invitation because I'd asked for it. Since she was a house owning
40 YO and he'd been married before, their list was interesting! They
did want some traditional stuff ( a matching set of chna, for example,
and some decent kitchen knives), but other things were more esoteric. I
think one was a length of a certain wood so he could finish off the
kitchen (everything marvelously hand crafted, right down to the grooves
in the wooden draining board! He's a CDT teacher).

ASKING for gifts/money/contributions towards the cost of the wedding is
tacky in the extreme. I even find it distasteful for bridesmaids to be
asked to pay for their own outfits. I made my bridesmaids dresses, my
mum bought my cousin's shoes, and my friend wore the ones she had for
her own wedding a couple of years before. I'd have been happy to buy
her new ones had she needed them. MY wedding, *I* pay!
--
Kate XXXXXX
Lady Catherine, Wardrobe Mistress of the Chocolate Buttons
http://www.diceyhome.free-online.co.uk
Click on Kate's Pages and explore!

Natalie wrote:

I'm sorry. I re-read my post once, but apparently it wasn't enough b/c
I'm reading it again and there are some horribly grammar mistakes.
Please forgive me.

NS

It's OK, I've lost me trusty red marking pen!


--
Kate XXXXXX (English teacher in remission!)
Lady Catherine, Wardrobe Mistress of the Chocolate Buttons
http://www.diceyhome.free-online.co.uk
Click on Kate's Pages and explore!

Marie Lewis wrote:

Incidentally, according to today's "The Times", only 3% of people are still
virgins on their wedding day.


Isn't it nice to see the media reporting GOOD news for a change? I'm a
little worried about that 3% though.

--Lia

That site is a scream! Got a lot of laughs out of it. Thanks for the link!

--
Carolyn in The Old Pueblo

If it ain't broke, you're not trying. --Red Green
If it ain't broke, it ain't mine. --Carolyn McCarty

If at first you don't succeed, switch to power tools. --Red Green
If at first you don't succeed, get a bigger hammer. --Carolyn McCarty

"Julia Altshuler" wrote in message
news:3yl%b.401742$I06.4373010@attbi_s01...
Before we go any further, y'all have got to check out
www.etiquettehell.com. The site is huge and will have you laughing
through your outraged tears at some of the attrocities people have come
up with. It isn't just weddings though they take up almost half.


I do remember reading in a 1940s era etiquette book reading something
about putting the wedding gifts on display each labeled with the giver's
name card. Friends could walk around and admire the loot. I wouldn't
mind bringing back that old tacky tradition if we could combine it with
this new tacky tradition. If I'm going to donate to a couple's
honeymoon, I'm going to watch! Give me a ticket to the wedding night
hotel room, and I'll cheer them on. I'll even give advice and comment
on technique. When I pay for something, I'm getting my money's worth.


--Lia


Taria wrote:
You guys are experts on just about everything. Help me out
here. I just got a shower invitation and at the bottom
was the places the couple are registered. One was this one:

http://www.thehoneymoon.com/
They actually have a registry so people can pay for their
honeymoon! I thought I had seen just about everything.
I guess not yet.

As much fun as it is to tell tales of one tacky fund raising effort more
outrageous than the next, I wonder if the guests don't contribute to the
state of affairs by putting up with it. When I'm "invited" to a so
called social affair in which there's a price of admission, I don't go,
and I don't send money. As the years have gone by, I get invited to
fewer and fewer which suits me fine. There are exceptions. I have
friends who call me to invite me out and ask if I'd mind bringing the
picnic lunch. These are people who've known me long enough to know I
like to cook. I have one friend who gives an annual Mardi Gras party
who is quite specific about what she'd like me to bring. It doesn't
bother me a bit that other guests bring nothing. (Who wants to eat food
made by people who hate cooking and are terrible at it?) If I ever did
tell that friend that I didn't feel like cooking, she'd say O.K. sure,
whatever (and probably run over to my house to take my temperature).


I digress. Imagine the newlyweds planning a whole fancy wedding that
they figure will be paid for by the guests. They've got registries,
hints, notes in the invitation, one tacky idea after another. Now
imagine all those guests ignoring the blatant requests and either going
to the wedding or not while ignoring the tackier elements. The bride
and groom would go out of business, and more brides and grooms would get
the idea.


--Lia

And you know, thats the one thing I wanted and didnt get! ;-)
Diana, sans silver celery server

The funny part about the silver celery server was that the person who gave it
to me said (in all seriousness) that it was a versatile piece as it could also
be used for collecting calling cards when people came to visit. Why didn't I
think of that? :

joan
joan o'reilly
http://members.aol.com/Joan8904/index.html

This is a bit far... We paid for our own wedding and honeymoon. we were
short of cash so all we did was go to a popular holiday area ( by train)
stay in a cheap B&B and we went home when the money ran out ( 3 days IIRC)
the B&B people were great! they knew it was our honeymoon so when we woke up
at 10ish we got our breakfast anyway even though breakfast ended at 8.30

We did ask for money though, as I wanted to buy a matching Wedgwood china
set and since they pretty pricey I didn't want to force anyone to buy a
certain something ( one coffee mug is a sad gift but @ $ 10 a mug is a bit
dear to ask for a set of 6)
Everyone knew what I was going to spend the money on and I had a photo of
the china for all to see at the reception. ( here you give the
presents/money/whatever AT the reception not before) we got so much money I
could buy a 4 person set of china with serving plates, coffee mugs, sugar
bowl and creamer. and there was enough money left over to buy a beautiful
set of cutlery too and a few bowls. I sent photo's of all I had bought to
those that lived far way and let everyone else see as soon as they visited
us.

My DH's boss let us use the restaurant he worked in at the time for free and
drove us to the castle in his big swanky Mercedes... his colleges made the
wedding lunch at cost and we used the cheapest room in the town castle which
is where all weddings are done, I bought a suit and hat instead of a wedding
dress and dh used his Sunday suit, I arranged the flowers so I got sensible
ones in a sensible amount. total cost for the day $ 500

--
8-)

Jessamy
In the Netherlands
http://www.geocities.com/jess_ayad/
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
You guys are experts on just about everything. Help me out
here. I just got a shower invitation and at the bottom
was the places the couple are registered. One was this one:

http://www.thehoneymoon.com/
They actually have a registry so people can pay for their
honeymoon! I thought I had seen just about everything.
I guess not yet. Is this OK? I know there is a lot about
this notion of weddings getting more out of hand but I
think this is over the edge. What do you guys think?
Thanks, Taria



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The funny part about the silver celery server was that the person who gave
it
to me said (in all seriousness) that it was a versatile piece as it could
also
be used for collecting calling cards when people came to visit. Why didn't
I
think of that? :

Who was this??? Scarlett O'Hara? Wow, you must run in some pretty shi-shi
circles Joan! I only got a stainless steel celery server when I got
married. 28 years later I have probably used it less than a dozen times.
--
Kathyl who must get to the printers to get my calling cards made up

http://community.webshots.com/user/kathylquiltz