A crafts forum. CraftBanter

If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Go Back   Home » CraftBanter forum » Textiles newsgroups » Quilting
Site Map Home Register Authors List Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read Web Partners

Another Baby Quilt gone unappreciated?



 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #21  
Old July 16th 03, 05:25 PM
Lisa Ellis
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Julia,

I never thought about explaining to her why I stopped giving her gifts, I think I sort of figured that she is
smart and would figure it out. I guess I will have to consider consider bringing the topic up.

lisae

Julia Altshuler wrote:

I'm sure I've told this story before, but I'll tell it again.

When I was 16, my grandmother sent me a check. I deposited it and neglected to
thank her. She waited a year for my birthday again, then told me to my face and
with real bitterness in her voice, that I hadn't thanked her the previous year
which is why I wasn't getting anything that year. I was stung. There was
nothing I could do except apologize vainly. She was right; I was wrong; that
was that. She never mentioned it again. It has been 30 years, and I've never
forgotten a thank-you note since. A lesson like that, hard though it was, is
the best gift I could have gotten.

My point: Don't just stop giving your niece gifts. Make the gift even more
special. Risk her anger by explaining. It might be the nicest thing you ever
do for her.

--Lia

Lisa Ellis wrote:

While I tend to agree with you that one should be unattached when giving a gift, I do not think it is too
much to expect a thank you. I gave my then 16 year old niece a wonderful twin sized bed quilt for Christmas
one year (I drew her name). She did not bother to thank me, and I would not know that she had even received
the quilt if I had not seen it on her bed while visiting my sister. I did not try to "coax acknowledgment
out of her," however, my niece has not received another gift from me and is unlikely to do so in the future.

lisae


Ads
  #22  
Old July 18th 03, 12:31 AM
Dragonfly
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default

(Cringing in her shoes...)
Jo...remember that stuff you sent my kids more than a year ago? Their
thank-you notes to you have been sitting on the top of my chest of
drawers about 13 or 14 months. I need to get them mailed to you. Still
same address? Do you need the green flannels anymore or can I just
leave that out?

Dragonfly
(embarrassed)

Johanna Gibson wrote in message . ..
On Tue, 15 Jul 2003 16:53:02 -0700, Lisa Ellis
wrote:

While I tend to agree with you that one should be unattached when giving a gift, I do not think it is too
much to expect a thank you. I gave my then 16 year old niece a wonderful twin sized bed quilt for Christmas
one year (I drew her name). She did not bother to thank me, and I would not know that she had even received
the quilt if I had not seen it on her bed while visiting my sister. I did not try to "coax acknowledgment
out of her," however, my niece has not received another gift from me and is unlikely to do so in the future.

lisae

I sent gifts to my sister's kids in Alaska and my brother's kids in
Oregon for years - all hand-made stuffed animals and dolls and things.
It was cheaper to spend my time making things (lightweight things) to
post overseas than spending money on some plastic toy and shipping
that over.
All I wanted to know was if it arrived by Christmas - I know that is
important to small children. Very rarely did I ever find out whether
it had arrived (much less get a thank you). I don't think you can do
the signature required post by international mail. This experience
was draining, and after several years of sending boxes of homemade
things to my brother (our mother sewed all of our clothes and toys, so
he isn't ignorant of how much time is involved) I got tired of this
situation and stopped sending things to my brother. My sister put the
kids on the phone at their birthday (niece June 11th, niece June 14th)
one year and my niece told me how much she liked the doll I had sent
her. That made me feel that it hadn't been a waste of time after all.
This niece and nephew are 10 and 15 respectively (though Melissa is
10 going on 40) and I send them books now, and sewing things for
Melissa who seemingly was inspired by my last visit, etc. But for
those who say giving should be something the giver does independent of
the recipient's reaction, I would say that giving repeatedly with no
acknowledgement that the gift even arrived, much less was received, is
a very draining experience. No one likes to feel that they are taken
for granted.



-- Jo in Scotland

 




Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Auction: C. Jean Horst "Heart of Roses" Quilt - SIGNED! Brian Bernardini Marketplace 0 September 1st 04 07:08 PM
Why would needleworkers attend quilt shows Debra Needlework 32 April 1st 04 04:08 PM
FS: Beautiful Handmade Heirloom Baby Quilt - Ebay Auction LFK Marketplace 0 March 13th 04 03:12 PM
Stampola Newsletter - July 7, 2003 Mindy at Stampola Rubberstamps 0 July 8th 03 05:35 AM


All times are GMT +1. The time now is 05:05 PM.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright ©2004-2024 CraftBanter.
The comments are property of their posters.