OT sad news

I don't think so either. A person only has one mother, and that makes it a
very unique loss. But the lost feeling changes in nature along the way. It
doesn't go away, but it changes.

Karen, Queen of Squishies


I don't think we ever get over the loss of a mother.

--
http://community.webshots.com/user/snigdibbly
SNIGDIBBLY

Oh Mel. I'm so sorry to hear this. I haven't been able to access the ng for
a while and didn't see your message until today.

{{{{HUGS}}}}


--
LN in NH (Who has been beading more than quilting in the last 2 years)

"M Rimmer" wrote in message
...
My mum (Sheila) died last night just after 2am. She was at home, I was
with her, along with dad, my sisters, and mum's brother and sisters. She'd
had cancer for 7 years, so we knew it was coming but it didn't half go
fast in the last few days.

She taught me (without ever saying it in so many words) that everything
made had been made by someone, and I could make things too if I just had
the right materials, tools, and know-how, and she taught me that
materials, tools, and know-how are all get-able. I'll always remember
being lulled to sleep by the sound of her old Singer treadle machine she
used to make clothes and soft furnishings. She could be an interfering old
ratbag of the first water, but she was the only interfering old ratbag I
had. When she knew the end was near she was very gracious and initiated a
reconciliation between us, for which I had long yearned but been unable to
begin. I think, above all, I am grateful for that.
--
M Rimmer

You are right - the sharp knife like pain becomes a duller throb - but the
vacuum space in your heart is just the same - so empty.

--
http://community.webshots.com/user/snigdibbly
SNIGDIBBLY
~e~
"
/ \
http://members.ebay.com/aboutme/snigdibbly.
http://www.ebaystores.com/snigdibbly...ox&refid=store
"Queen of Squishies" RisingStars @ KarenTucker.com wrote in message
news:7CFte.89235$nG6.31577@attbi_s22...
I don't think so either. A person only has one mother, and that makes it a
very unique loss. But the lost feeling changes in nature along the way.
It
doesn't go away, but it changes.

Karen, Queen of Squishies


I don't think we ever get over the loss of a mother.

--
http://community.webshots.com/user/snigdibbly
SNIGDIBBLY

SNIGDIBBLY wrote:
You are right - the sharp knife like pain becomes a duller throb - but the
vacuum space in your heart is just the same - so empty.


Yeah. :-( When I think about her, mostly I feel a deep sense of loss.
Occasionally, I'll be surprised by a full-blown stabbing grief, all it
takes is hearing someone who sounds like her or smell someone who uses
the same scents she did, stuff like that.

Sometimes I smell her in my house. It's gotta be her -- I don't use any
scented products and my men certainly don't use anything that smells
like her perfume.

--

the black rose
Research Associate in the Field of Child Development and Human
Relations
http://community.webshots.com/user/blackrosequilts
2005 BOMs: http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/blackrosequilts/my_photos

-------- __o
----- -\. -------- __o
--- ( )/ ( ) ---- -\.
-------------------- ( )/ ( )
-----------------------------------------

Do you ever catch a passing glimpse of your mom in a mirror?
Sometimes I do. Sometimes I can see mom in the way a sister
looks or stands or moves. Kind of odd. We have sort of gotten
to the point of laughing and teasing about some of the wacky
things my mom did and my dad can smile remembering her. For
a long time we really didn't mention her to dad without his
being really upset. Weird unexplainable things happen in
dad's house pretty often. Hope it is mom showing up to cause
a fuss just like she did when she was here with up in this life.
I try to talk about mom and my dh's folks so the kids can keep the
memory alive. Boy I feel your loss Rose and everyone that deals with
this so very deep loss.
Hugs, Taria

the black rose wrote:



Yeah. :-( When I think about her, mostly I feel a deep sense of loss.
Occasionally, I'll be surprised by a full-blown stabbing grief, all it
takes is hearing someone who sounds like her or smell someone who uses
the same scents she did, stuff like that.

Sometimes I smell her in my house. It's gotta be her -- I don't use any
scented products and my men certainly don't use anything that smells
like her perfume.

My mother passed 9 yrs ago. We had a fairly strained relationship, to
put it mildly.

Almost 4 yrs ago I met my now-DH. My DMIL is the same age as my mother
would have been now, and I have the honor of being her main caretaker,
along with DH. There are so many similarities between the two women,
it's uncanny. Their love of baking, their green thumbs, their love of
reading, etc. I feel like I have been given another chance to do some
of the things we never did the first time around. But this time it is
with someone who can love me for me.

Each morning when I walk out to my car, I pass the jasmine bush in the
yard, and the fragrance never fails to transport me back to my mother's
jasmine plant on the side of the house where I grew up.

Thanks for these posts,
Ginger in CA
who just had some of those "ah-ha!" moments
Taria wrote:
Do you ever catch a passing glimpse of your mom in a mirror?
Sometimes I do. Sometimes I can see mom in the way a sister
looks or stands or moves. Kind of odd. We have sort of gotten
to the point of laughing and teasing about some of the wacky
things my mom did and my dad can smile remembering her. For
a long time we really didn't mention her to dad without his
being really upset. Weird unexplainable things happen in
dad's house pretty often. Hope it is mom showing up to cause
a fuss just like she did when she was here with up in this life.
I try to talk about mom and my dh's folks so the kids can keep the
memory alive. Boy I feel your loss Rose and everyone that deals with
this so very deep loss.
Hugs, Taria

the black rose wrote:



Yeah. :-( When I think about her, mostly I feel a deep sense of loss.
Occasionally, I'll be surprised by a full-blown stabbing grief, all it
takes is hearing someone who sounds like her or smell someone who uses
the same scents she did, stuff like that.

Sometimes I smell her in my house. It's gotta be her -- I don't use any
scented products and my men certainly don't use anything that smells
like her perfume.

Rose,
Everyone is different of course. (Duh!) But I do think that the stabbing
grief becomes less frequent, and less sharp. At least that is my
experience after seven years. Hugs. PAT

Taria,
This happens with us too. My sister said that when ever she sees my
hands, it is like seeing Mom's hands. I see things that my sisters do
that brings a deju vu feeling about Mom. Remembering her is a blessing
.... especially when we share her idiocyncracies, and enjoy a giggle!
Hugs. PAT in VA/USA

Taria wrote:

Do you ever catch a passing glimpse of your mom in a mirror?
Sometimes I do. Sometimes I can see mom in the way a sister
looks or stands or moves. Kind of odd. We have sort of gotten
to the point of laughing and teasing about some of the wacky
things my mom did and my dad can smile remembering her. For
a long time we really didn't mention her to dad without his
being really upset. Weird unexplainable things happen in
dad's house pretty often. Hope it is mom showing up to cause
a fuss just like she did when she was here with up in this life.
I try to talk about mom and my dh's folks so the kids can keep the
memory alive. Boy I feel your loss Rose and everyone that deals with
this so very deep loss.
Hugs, Taria

the black rose wrote:




Yeah. :-( When I think about her, mostly I feel a deep sense of
loss. Occasionally, I'll be surprised by a full-blown stabbing grief,
all it takes is hearing someone who sounds like her or smell someone
who uses the same scents she did, stuff like that.

Sometimes I smell her in my house. It's gotta be her -- I don't use
any scented products and my men certainly don't use anything that
smells like her perfume.

Well of course it is. My mother and Granny Pete are in my sewing room
knocking stuff down, looking over my shoulder and whispering in my ear. I
feel their presence so strongly that I swear if I look fast enough over my
right shoulder I will catch a glimpse of them going out the door. It's the
same with my DH.

--
http://community.webshots.com/user/snigdibbly
SNIGDIBBLY
~e~
"
/ \
http://members.ebay.com/aboutme/snigdibbly.
http://www.ebaystores.com/snigdibbly...ox&refid=store
"the black rose" wrote in message
...
SNIGDIBBLY wrote:
You are right - the sharp knife like pain becomes a duller throb - but
the vacuum space in your heart is just the same - so empty.


Yeah. :-( When I think about her, mostly I feel a deep sense of loss.
Occasionally, I'll be surprised by a full-blown stabbing grief, all it
takes is hearing someone who sounds like her or smell someone who uses the
same scents she did, stuff like that.

Sometimes I smell her in my house. It's gotta be her -- I don't use any
scented products and my men certainly don't use anything that smells like
her perfume.

--

the black rose
Research Associate in the Field of Child Development and Human
Relations
http://community.webshots.com/user/blackrosequilts
2005 BOMs: http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/blackrosequilts/my_photos

-------- __o
----- -\. -------- __o
--- ( )/ ( ) ---- -\.
-------------------- ( )/ ( )
-----------------------------------------

Thanks to you too Ginger : )
Taria

Ginger in CA wrote:

My mother passed 9 yrs ago. We had a fairly strained relationship, to
put it mildly.

Almost 4 yrs ago I met my now-DH. My DMIL is the same age as my mother
would have been now, and I have the honor of being her main caretaker,
along with DH. There are so many similarities between the two women,
it's uncanny. Their love of baking, their green thumbs, their love of
reading, etc. I feel like I have been given another chance to do some
of the things we never did the first time around. But this time it is
with someone who can love me for me.

Each morning when I walk out to my car, I pass the jasmine bush in the
yard, and the fragrance never fails to transport me back to my mother's
jasmine plant on the side of the house where I grew up.

Thanks for these posts,
Ginger in CA
who just had some of those "ah-ha!" moments

Thanks everyone who posted kind messages. Mum's funeral was yesterday
and was really nice, as these things go. I quilted her a musical angel
onto a cream satin pillow for the coffin. Afterwards we had a riotous
party with very much playing of music and singing in the garden late
into the night, and catching up with long-lost friends and family. Mum
would have loved it.
--
M Rimmer