OT - Please Help Ladies!! Restroom Etiquette - Your Opinions Needed!!

In article , Shelly
writes
YES, it can. If you have a colostomy, you should have the items necessary
for clean up with you and take them into any size stall. I know the
procedure well. This is a task I perform several times daily for others at
work. ;o) The same as a woman on her period. She takes the tampon or pad
into the stall with her, cleans up and takes care of business with a normal
bodily function.


Not at all: I could not SEE my colostomy and so I needed the mirror to
check it was clean and that the bag was in the right place.

How can you assume all colostomies are the same?
--
Marie Lewis

In article , Shelly
writes
I'm a nurse Marie. I know exactly what I am talking about and have a wealth
of knowledge on the subject. ;o)
Shelly


You did not know the position of my stoma.

Believe me, I needed the mirror.

And, in the UK, "disabled" loos are for the disabled.
--
Marie Lewis

In article ,
Charlotte writes


Marie Lewis wrote:

In article 8lwsb.181238$HS4.1505774@attbi_s01, Charlotte Hippen
writes

1- Although I understand the situation, I don't feel comfortable
with a man
in the ladies room even with a young daughter.
May one ask, politely, why?

I am not the original Charlotte but I'd be happy to tell you why I
would be uncomfortable.

I don't share facilities (at the same time) with men. Period. Not in my
family and not with strangers. That is why there are two restrooms. We
could eliminate this issue entirely if everyone just used a unisex
together. We don't. Why?

-Charlotte

I do not know. They do in many countries. I have used unisex toilets
in France and never seen anything I should no see. It is even safer for
children. Think about it.

We often have men cleaning the toilets.
--
Marie Lewis

In article ,
Charlotte writes


Marie Lewis wrote:


I cannot imagine being embarrassed by this.
Often, the cleaners are men. They cannot see inside the stalls,
after all.

I have never used a facility that was simultaneously being cleaned by a
man. Never. I believe it may be against the law here.

One can see inside the stalls. This is true of the stalls I've seen in
France and the UK too.

-Charlotte

How many have you seen like that? Where were they? I do not know where
you went.

Do people peer under doors and over them? How awful. Isn't that
against the law?

I must admit that the spaces above and below doors in the USA are far
too big. Maybe it is because of drug users.

It is certainly not against the law in the UK or France to have male
cleaners in public toilets, just as there are very often female cleaners
in male toilets. Some places only employ one cleaner. How would you
get around that?

I suppose we are less uptight over here, about bodily functions. Well,
I know we are and certainly on the continent they are less prudish even
than us.

I could use the often employed English phrase "Don't get your knickers
in a twist" but you might take it too personally. We call underpants
"knickers" here.
--
Marie Lewis

I'm the original one. There are a couple of reasons I would feel
uncomfortable. We have separate public restrooms for the sexes so finding a
man in the ladies room is not what I'm used to, nor has it ever happened to
me. If we had unisex bathrooms then I guess I would be used to it and it
wouldn't make me feel uncomfortable. Also, although we have stalls for
privacy in the bathrooms, you don't have total privacy. From reading a few
of the other posts I am under the impression you are not from the US (I
maybe wrong). I've never been in a bathroom that didn't have cracks in the
stalls. Granted they are often very small and very little can be seen
through but this is not always the case. Alot of restrooms, at least around
here, have larger cracks allowing the other ladies in the restroom (and a
man if present) to see into the stalls. And in some cases the doors to the
stalls don't even latch anymore. That's why I don't want a man in the
ladies restroom while I'm using the facilities.

Charlotte



"Charlotte" wrote in message
...


Marie Lewis wrote:

In article 8lwsb.181238$HS4.1505774@attbi_s01, Charlotte Hippen
writes

1- Although I understand the situation, I don't feel comfortable with
a man
in the ladies room even with a young daughter.


May one ask, politely, why?

I am not the original Charlotte but I'd be happy to tell you why I would
be uncomfortable.

I don't share facilities (at the same time) with men. Period. Not in my
family and not with strangers. That is why there are two restrooms. We
could eliminate this issue entirely if everyone just used a unisex
together. We don't. Why?

-Charlotte

As I said in my other reply one can often easily see into the stalls here.
And I believe the other Charlotte is right about it being against the law.
When bathrooms are being cleaned by a person of the opposite sex the
restrooms are closed and people are asked to temporarily use other
facilities.

Charlotte

"Charlotte" wrote in message
...


Marie Lewis wrote:


I cannot imagine being embarrassed by this.

Often, the cleaners are men. They cannot see inside the stalls, after
all.

I have never used a facility that was simultaneously being cleaned by a
man. Never. I believe it may be against the law here.

One can see inside the stalls. This is true of the stalls I've seen in
France and the UK too.

-Charlotte

Marie Lewis wrote:

In article ,
Charlotte writes

I have never used a facility that was simultaneously being cleaned by
a man. Never. I believe it may be against the law here.

One can see inside the stalls. This is true of the stalls I've seen in
France and the UK too.

-Charlotte

How many have you seen like that? Where were they? I do not know where
you went.

I lived for seven months in the UK. I have traveled all over the
continent (and other continents I might add). I have been to France on
holiday on three separate occasions. Would you like me to list all the
restrooms I used? You're kidding right?

Do people peer under doors and over them? How awful. Isn't that
against the law?

I should think so.

I must admit that the spaces above and below doors in the USA are far
too big. Maybe it is because of drug users.

The only (dis)accomodation I've seen for drug users in a bathroom is the
black-lit bathrooms in Victoria Station.

In order to deter drug users by open stalls wouldn't one need to peer
into them to ensure the occupant wasn't using drugs? Isn't that against
the law?

It is certainly not against the law in the UK or France to have male
cleaners in public toilets, just as there are very often female cleaners
in male toilets. Some places only employ one cleaner. How would you
get around that?

At my office Ray, the restroom cleaner, calls into the restroom that it
is time for it to be cleaned. If I'm in there I call out that I will be
leaving shortly. He closes the facility and we all use the one-person,
unisex, "family" and handicapped room for the short period when the
restroom is closed. That is how we get over it.

I suppose we are less uptight over here, about bodily functions. Well,
I know we are and certainly on the continent they are less prudish even
than us.

Ain't that the truth! A nightclub in the UK is the only place I've been
to where there were people having sex on the floor of every one of the
stalls. Needless to say I no longer had to "go". I'm from California, we
aren't uptight about our bodies but I don't need to have anyone see me
do my business. Even you don't want people seeing you clean your stoma.

I could use the often employed English phrase "Don't get your knickers
in a twist" but you might take it too personally. We call underpants
"knickers" here.

I might say that to you in the context of your handicap that is, as you
say, an issue of privacy, not mobility. You might think about being less
uptight about your bodily functions....

-Charlotte

The stalls in bathrooms have been the same for many years.
Not due to drug users I can assure you. If you all are so much
less uptight 'over there' why would the open space above
and below the doors bother you? Marie, you have gotten
to the point of absolutely wacky (for lack of a less nice
word) We won't see you this side of the pond because I
assure you are restrooms are just not suited to your needs.
You probably just need to stay near home where things
work for you.
Taria

Marie Lewis wrote:

In article ,
Charlotte writes


Marie Lewis wrote:



How many have you seen like that? Where were they? I do not know where
you went.

Do people peer under doors and over them? How awful. Isn't that
against the law?

I must admit that the spaces above and below doors in the USA are far
too big. Maybe it is because of drug users.

It is certainly not against the law in the UK or France to have male
cleaners in public toilets, just as there are very often female cleaners
in male toilets. Some places only employ one cleaner. How would you
get around that?

I suppose we are less uptight over here, about bodily functions. Well,
I know we are and certainly on the continent they are less prudish even
than us.

I could use the often employed English phrase "Don't get your knickers
in a twist" but you might take it too personally. We call underpants
"knickers" here.
--
Marie Lewis

Cynthia wrote:

"nomorespam" wrote in message
...
an invisible disability would most likely not require a larger stall.....

another example of an invisible disability. A few years ago (I was 19) I was
having really bad back problems. I could walk perfetly well with very
little pain. I could lay down with very little pain. Bending at the waist
was extremely painful and I couldn't sit down without something to hold on
to. I still had to go out in public to go to school and work so I used the
handicapped accessible stall. People seeing me walk would have assumed I
was perfectly healthy and able but I was not.
--
Cynthia
Remover the growl from the e-mail address to reply

I had similar problems after falling down the stairs and jarring all the
'seams' in my pelvis slightly open! I still occasionally get pain in my
tailbone, and sciatica because of it. The effects are temporary but
recurring - and invisible to the casual observer (i.e. one without
Superman's x-ray vision!)
--
Kate XXXXXX
Lady Catherine, Wardrobe Mistress of the Chocolate Buttons
http://www.diceyhome.free-online.co.uk
Click on Kate's Pages and explore!

One thing I would like to add:

Marie, I know you said that you are now in a chair, that the privacy
issue came up in the past.

My position is that everyone deserves privacy when the sign on the door
indicates it is on offer, whether you, Marie, think she should have it
or not. If the sign indicated "Unisex" and a man walked in I would not
be alarmed. If the sign indicated "Women's" I would. It's a simple
matter of setting expectations (and the resulting choices we all make).

Ta very much,
-Charlotte